A few years ago, over dinner one night with some friends with whom I share a love of delicious food, sushi, great cocktails, politics, and movies, we realized that in all the years we’ve known each other, we’ve never had. Travel with.
Since we all saved so many points and miles, we thought how fun it would be to go somewhere spontaneous.
“Let’s do it,” we all declared. So we got award tickets to Hong Kong for the following week.
Halfway around the world, we arrived at our hotel late in the evening. After a late dinner, we went back to the hotel, where I decided to sleep. As fun as Hong Kong is at night (and pretty wild), I wanted to try to adjust to the local time zone so I could make the most of the rest of our trip.
My friends had other ideas: they were going to a party. So I said good night and they left.
When I woke up, it was still dark. I looked at the time. It was 5:30 am. I saw my two friends asleep; A third was apparently still at the party.
Letting them rest, I got ready and headed out to enjoy the city before the tourists swelled and it became noisy, chaotic and crowded. Hong Kong is one of my favorite cities, and I love its peaceful calm in the morning. All those grandmas and grandpas are out for a walk, doing tai chi in the park and eating dim sum.
With so much to do (and eat), I didn’t want to waste any time. After an early breakfast of dim sum, I walked around, had some tea, read a book, and took photos of the empty streets.
It was late afternoon when I finally heard from my friends. We met for lunch at a noodle shop and planned our day.
Before we booked our trip, I asked them what they wanted to do. Knowing them, I knew it would involve fancy dinners (Hong Kong has some really fine dining), but I insisted that as a backpacker, what I really like are hole-in-the-wall restaurants, cheap activities, wandering around. , and just enjoy the everyday life of a place.
“No problem,” they said. They were travelers too, and they too wanted to go below the surface. The idea of dim sum, markets and fun local bars appealed to them as much as it did to me.
But that didn’t happen.
My friends stayed out late every night partying, slept late, only wanted to eat at expensive restaurants, and didn’t want to go out.
As the days passed we were like ships in the night. Outside of a few dinners, I didn’t see much of it. But, being used to traveling alone, that was fine with me. I can have my own fun. But not getting time with my friends was frustrating. It defeated the purpose of the tour.
On the way back to the airport, they talked about doing it all again someday. But not me. I thought to myself, “We’ll never do this again.”
The trip taught me that, while people like a certain travel style in theory, the reality is often very different. In fact, over the years, I’ve traveled with many friends whose style is completely different from mine.
As Mark Twain said, “I have found that there is no sure way to find out whether you like people or hate them than by traveling with them.” I couldn’t agree more. It’s important to be careful when traveling with anyone, even your closest friends. It’s a very personal experience, and you want to make sure their style matches yours.
After many successful — and not so successful — trips with friends (some of whom I consider closest to me), I’ve compiled a list of questions I think are important to ask people (of course, you know your friends, but I Still found this helpful):
- What activities do you want to do?
- i like [activity]. I will probably see/do a lot more of these on our trip. will you come with me
- how do you feel [activity]?
- Are you okay doing things alone, or do you want to do everything together?
- I don’t eat expensive food on the road. How do you feel about that?
- Are you okay with eating street food?
- I like to be out the door by 9am every morning. do you? (Or: I’m a night person. Are you okay with starting late?)
- Are you planning to stay out late?
It’s fine if you’re not all on the same page, as long as you’re comfortable spending time together. If you have different travel styles but are not okay with being an independent traveler (or vice versa), that will cause a problem. I’ve done plenty of trips with friends where we just overlapped on some stuff, but it wasn’t a problem. No one seemed to care when one of us went off to do our own thing, and it gave us things to talk about when we came back later.
The more trips I’ve taken with friends, the smarter I’ve become about which trips I take. But sometimes you never know ahead of time. What people say and what they do can be two different things. They may say they want to travel the same way or do the same things – and then you get down the road and it’s the opposite.
But, since that big spontaneous trip with friends, I’ve learned that asking the right questions beforehand can really reduce your chances of running into this kind of conflict.
Use my list — or come up with your own — but don’t go on a trip with a friend who isn’t at least 60% aligned with your style and interests!
Book Your Trip to Hong Kong: Logistical Tips and Tricks
Book your flight
to use Skyscanner To find cheap flights. They are my favorite search engine because they find websites and airlines worldwide so you always know no stone is left unturned.
Book your accommodation
You can book your hostel Hostelworld Because they have the largest inventory and the best deals. Use if you want to stay somewhere other than a hostel Booking.com Because they consistently return the cheapest rates for guesthouses and cheap hotels. My favorite places to stay are:
For even more places to stay in Hong Kong, check out my post on my favorite hostels in the city. He has a more detailed list!
Don’t forget travel insurance
Travel insurance will protect you against illness, injury, theft and cancellation. It’s comprehensive protection in case anything goes wrong. I never go on a trip without it as I have had to use it many times in the past. My favorite companies that offer great service and value are:
Looking for the best companies to save money?
Check out my resource page for the best companies to use when you travel. I list all the things I use to save money when I’m on the road. They will save you money when you travel.
Want more information on Hong Kong?
Be sure to visit our robust destination guide on Hong Kong for even more planning tips!